[RL with Haruhi - Damage Control Part 1]

[lockon2urheart]

[As soon as the Doctor had told him about Haruhi's exploits at the wedding, Lockon had resolved to track her down. They clearly needed to talk, and she hadn't been to see him this whole time - well, he could walk unaided for short periods, now. He was going to go to her, if she wouldn't come to him.

The Doctor had said she was in the TARDIS, which wasn't even technically off hospital grounds. Now he was off the IV he had nothing stopping him from making the short trip to the blue box. Although he wouldn't win any races, he reached it without incident and knocked a few times on the door. He didn't shout. She might not have answered, if she was avoiding him.]

Comments

[godisagirl.livejournal.com]

Emotions are-

[she can't fight him at this point and her vision is starting to blur as her
body goes limp against her will. She leans against his chest because she can't pull away and leans againt his chest, listening to his breathing, on the verge of passing out]

[lockon2urheart]

Doesn't matter. It's okay. Just breathe, Haruhi, focus on that. Match mine, okay?

[Not panicking, using all his self-control to keep his breathing and heart rate as calm and steady as he can. Same with his voice, talking calmly and quietly.] Deep breaths. Nice and relaxed. Just deep breaths.

[godisagirl.livejournal.com]

[mumbles back]

Just breathe.

[starts trying to match his breathing like he says, one small shaking hand coming to grip his shirt]

[lockon2urheart]

[relieved, really relieved, that she's finally responding positively.]

That's it.

[Keeping the slow, steady pattern up, he moves one hand to cover hers.]

[godisagirl.livejournal.com]

[keeps quiet as she leans against his chest, she feels dizzy and sick and is still rather close to passing out. She tries to talk but everything feels so heavy that all she can do is lean against him]

[lockon2urheart]

Shhh. It's okay, don't try to say anything. Just concentrate on getting some air in your lungs, okay? We can talk in a minute. I'll still be here.

[godisagirl.livejournal.com]

[his voice is starting to get far away as her vision goes dark. And she's out, but without her concious mind taking over, her body is able to start her breathing right again]

[lockon2urheart]

[She's too close to his body for him not to notice her faint.]

Haruhi?

[He looks down at her, worriedly, and she's out like a light, but...she's breathing normally, at least. That much is good. But now what...?

He looks up and around the room. Her bedroom, by the looks of things. The answer was very simple, then. He gathers her up in his arms, carefully, and carries her over to the bed before gently lying her down on it. He follows, sitting down on the edge of the bed and stroking her hair with one hand while he works out what he should do. Stay and wait for her to wake up, or go like she'd told him to before?

He lets out a little tired sigh, and moves his hand away. It's been an emotionally draining visit, for both of them. She might have told him to go, but she might well never forgive him if he was gone when she woke up. The worst she could do if he stuck around was tell him to leave again.

And so, he stays where he is, using the time to think over the conversation they'd had.]

[godisagirl.livejournal.com]

[With a gasp, she jerks awake, coughing slightly. She can't remember passing out and her chest hurts badly from hypervenilating.

She looks around, trying to remember where she is and quicky realizes it's her room. Haruhi tries to sit up but everything is still so heavy that the most she can do is turn her head.

She looks to the side and sees Lockon and decides, in that instant, she doesn't want him to go.]

Don't-

[It's hard to speak in her sorry state and the best she can do is reach out with her hand and grab his shirt]

[lockon2urheart]

[Her gasp alerted him to her waking up, and he straightened from where he'd been resting his chin in his hand with his elbows on his knees.

When she spoke and reached for him, he mirrored his earlier gesture and clasped his hand around hers. He smiled reassuringly.]

Hey, I'm not going anywhere. Don't worry.

[godisagirl.livejournal.com]

'kay.

[It hurt, he was so kind that it hurt, after all she had said. And he was still here, even after she'd yelled. Tears once again flooded her eyes and she struggled to raise her hand to wipe them away, reminding her painfully that she was not strong like he had said.]

[lockon2urheart]

Hey, hey, it's okay. [He reached down with his other hand to stroke her hair again gently.]

[godisagirl.livejournal.com]

M'trying t'be strong.

[leans into his hand]

[lockon2urheart]

[strokes her cheek with his thumb]

Strong is good, but sometimes the strongest thing you can do is let yourself be emotional, you know? It takes strength to let it all out. If you bottle it up, it'll just come back to bite you in the end.

[godisagirl.livejournal.com]

[that's so soothing]

No, being strong would be dealing with it. No crying.

[lockon2urheart]

[keeps doing it, with an affectionate sigh.]

You're not gonna listen to me to matter how much I say it, are you?

[godisagirl.livejournal.com]

[her breathe hitches slightly and she moves to curl up against him, trembling slightly]